What skills do you have? What experience have you experienced? Describe your personality in no more than 147 words, why do you even want to work for us?
I WANT SOME MONEY DAMMIT!
That’s all I want. I want you to look at me, look at the fact that I used to work in a Chinese take away and get cash-in-hand-less-than-minimum-wage that I used to pay for driving lessons with, and then give me a job. I’ve been applying for various jobs online and it’s getting to the point where the applications are relatively laughable. Guys – if you’ve somehow found this and I’ve sent an application to you, how have you got your mits on this and keep reading, the more followers, the better 😉 Idk. It’s just tedious to fill out a form that takes an hour and then to find out that you’ve been invited to answer the joyous multiple questions about how you would cope in particular situations. These are the worst. If the answers aren’t too obscure, there isn’t one that you’d actually pick. And the naughty thing about it is that you can’t explain your reasoning for choosing A, B or C, so you’re either wrong or you’re right, no matter how many times they claim that there’s no right answer.
I’m twenty years old, going into third year and all I want is my own money that’s not borrowed from the government. But apparently you have to be the perfect employee to be taken on by even the smallest company. I’m certainly not perfect, nobody is, but I am hard working and if you give me a job to do I’m going to damn well do it and I’ll do it well. Maybe I should add this to the bottom of my CV…
Please hire me. Just look at how adorable I am!